But Neil and Cesar, yes!! I get it and feel it right away. These are two favorites of mine, spookily intense individualistic musicians not afraid of dissonance, and my God I never noticed how much they look like the same person! It’s hilarious, fantastic, makes me grateful and weepy for how the soul works. Just recently I was drawn to revisit my memories of a Franck concert I enjoyed some years ago, trying to recall what pieces I might have heard. For the next several days I instead found myself remembering, singing, and playing my favorite Neil Young tunes, including Old Man, Sugar Mountain, and Pocahontas. My soul knows, I made the unconscious connection!I love reincarnation because through it you find your real friends: eternal souls with your own, in love together creating for God. So this morning when I was feeling heavy from life, the words of Mr. Soul sprang to mind and I laughed picturing Neil and Cesar’s shared immortal face. Mr. Soul is Mr. Young's startling soul-searching song about how a female fan letter is confronting the artist with his desires for recognition. Success may alienate him from his true source of self, as fame distorts reality and people want him to be something he’s not. The woman finds him strange but doesn’t want him to change, because he meant something to her that upset her in a way she can cherish. But Neil doesn’t know what part of him affected her so, and anyway of course he’s going to change, everyone does.
(Neil was particularly devoted to change, alienating acoustic fans in later life with electronic phases that I equally enjoyed. Last year the elder Neil was noted for meeting with Steve Jobs just before Steve died, to personally push for a new digital standard that could convey a musician's art, since the ubiquitous mp3 format, so popular for its small compacted files, loses an astonishing 95% of audio information! Steve is incidentally another famous reincarnated innovator I've written about in this blog thanks to Ahtun Re's identification.)
Mr. Soul
(words and music by Neil Young, I'm claiming fair use to display here in the context of lyric analysis)
Oh, hello Mr. Soul, I dropped by to pick up a reason
For the thought that I caught that my head is the event of the season
Why in crowds just a trace of my face could seem so pleasin'
I'll cop out to the change, but a stranger is putting the tease on.
I was down on a frown when the messenger brought me a letter
I was raised by the praise of a fan who said I upset her
Any girl in the world could have easily known me better
She said, You're strange, but don't change, and I let her.
In a while will the smile on my face turn to plaster?
Stick around while the clown who is sick does the trick of disaster
For the race of my head and my face is moving much faster
Is it strange I should change? I don't know, why don't you ask her?
We all do what Neil’s fan does here, we selectively take in views of each other that we need to treasure, not wanting the person to change or be more complex. Neil knows that he can’t hold the image that the woman wants of him, like the tragic harlequin who makes others laugh but cries alone. The artist transforms personal disasters into expressions of great art that others can become inspired within. Strangers can attach their own meanings to make their own transformations without ever having to know the facts of the artist, only to have shared a deeper humanity.
We selectively receive for our needs all the time, and I was doing this today to Neil’s song. Of course I was making the lyrics be about his own reincarnating mister soul, whose manifestly masculine face had so strangely changed from Cesar Franck to Neil Young. The smile of Franck has turned to plaster busts, while Neil’s head raced ahead so much faster. Now I can listen to the recurring themes and increasing dissonance of Rust Never Sleeps, and smile to hear the moods of the great French organist working through his cyclic forms. Is it strange that human beings should change this way? Ask the people who are affected by them.
And now, having received that inspiration and comfort from the soul level, I still need to get on with my day. I still need to move through the chores that weighed upon me before Mr. Soul made me smile. For this trick of disaster I will try to slow down the race in my head, using the following Master Meditation that I got from my guides yesterday.
Here’s the challenge: to become the masters of our own lives, the ones who own our realities and work for ourselves, we must reintegrate all the frightened hurt parts of our soul that we’ve split off into a world of disjoint individuals that can’t cooperate. We all have our strengths and weaknesses, and we’ve tried to use natural specialization as a reason to stay in our strengths and blame someone else for our weakness. Think of an area of your life that you know you’re not handling well. Perhaps you’d like to think that it’s someone else’s job, something you just weren’t meant to do, and maybe you’re right that someone else can do it better. But mastery means owning all of your life, including the parts that you need help with, including the helpers, including the needs, including the tasks. They’re all parts of you!
The master looks directly at what needs to be done, and takes charge to do it themselves or get the right helpers to do it for them. Directions of mistake and failure are sensed and faced quickly so resources can be calmly reassigned. Lessons are learned with compassion and forgiveness for what couldn’t or wouldn't function in roles that were wrong for them; "that’s ok, I’ll get someone else, I’m in charge of this project, let's give you another task." There is no waiting, no wishing, no fear, blame, judgment, or punishment. Success is assured starting now, because this is my life and my goals are self-guaranteed as I grow with them.
Our natural state and divine right is to be the mister master soul who enters the world to accomplish a goal. The dynamism of existence is driven by cycles more powerful than free will, so our free will can only choose or not choose to go where we need to go. This means that if you have a bodily need and it’s time to fulfill it, your master self will be there doing what must be done. If you choose to hold back and hold onto fears or control or whatever you take as a reason to not go into your life, then you will split off. You will become the frightened weaker fragment who loses its connection to God and the source. As a fragment you can live off your energetic savings for a while, your fat of stockpiled resources, your security buffer, and choose to not think about what you’re avoiding until the cycle comes around again to where you are strong. Aha, I feel great again, I didn’t need to go there! You can say this to yourself, but you will feel it is wrong, as an unsustainable lifestyle, world, and weakness in all of humanity grows. It is your reality after all, and anyone in it is sharing the ride for where they are going, so they make it their reality as well. The universe is deeply shared, which is cause for much joy and creating together, not blame and giving away the power of ownership.
You’ll know that something is wrong when life pushes you to do something you’re not good at, not familiar with, weak in, and suddenly you’re terrified rather than curious and excited for something to try. You'll look at something you need to do and feel awful, telling yourself I can’t do that, look at how bad it feels just to think about doing it! If I go there, it’ll take me over, ruin my life, never let me go. Let someone else deal with that, I can’t think about it, I tried, it was a nightmare.
This is what I call the misattribution of emotional source. It’s a form of projection. You look at a place where you belong, where your mastery goes, and you feel how split off from your power you have become. You feel weak and small, and you mistakenly attribute the weakness and smallness to the place or the task, rather than to your avoidance of it. Feelings of consequence that were numb and distant are coming up strong into view, without anything having changed yet. If you actually got into your mastery and did what you need to do, that would be a change and you might feel really great! You don't know, you can't feel from where you are not.
The feelings of helplessness hopelessness are your current state of not yet reuniting with the rest of your soul that masters the place where you need to go. Your master self does what it needs to do on the cycle of life, bringing its energies of joyful living with it when it's time to move on. Cycles help life to grow, to not have to be everywhere and do everything all at once. You'll get to live off each success for a while and be back again before it runs out. Your connection to the source is thus not fragile so long as you keep moving along, God is with you everywhere you need to go.
When you fear a soulless Godless place that you cannot enter or it will destroy you, then that’s a place where you are disconnected from the cycles of God and your own master self. And to be sure, you ought not to go there just looking for trouble, as so many who like to make judgments do. Don't misuse what you're not ready to use, don't condemn what another has found a use for, even if that's not a use good for you. But when the natural rhythms of your destiny says it’s time and you know that you need to get something from there, don’t assume it’s the place that will be the disaster if disaster's what you fear. The disaster would be your current disconnection from another part of your own life and you. Your version of how a place is to be used is waiting to shine. The master in you is calling you home to another piece of your total success in the visible world. Cycles of manifest masculine goal achievement, on a background of continuous feminine support, health, and love, are the way of eternal life. Your body and soul know how much they belong together, do you?
So here is the Master Meditation, very simple and applicable. Whenever you notice your fear and reluctance to deal with a situation, don’t condemn yourself or others and push against wills, first try visualizing this reunification experience even just a little, to the extent that you can afford. Then do a step of what must be done, and don't be surprised if you feel more love, bliss, and safety than you thought possible. Bliss is a sign of doing life right.
1) Picture yourself in the difficult fearful place that you need to deal with. Do not imagine that you are your current scared weakened self, imagine instead what it would feel like to be able to do what needs to be done. Feel the confidence, skill, and support that some people have when faced with this challenge; you know you've seen or imagined people who handle this well, it just wasn’t you. The goal of this step is not to fantasize a way out of yourself, such as being so rich and famous that you don’t really have to do anything except throw money at the problem and tell servants to do it for you. The goal is to start close from where you are now, but somehow magically you’re in the right mood and seeing where to begin, so you can start functioning sustainably and enter the eternal flow. This is your master self, where the rest of your life begins. You become liberated, this was easy, you’re not trapped here forever after all! You can picture yourself reaching a stopping point, feeling satisfied, and getting ready to do something else. You'll be back this way again to pick up where you left off in the cycles of life, it's all going to be okay now. Cycles give you the time and support to do everything that you need and want, so life masters own and enjoy their own cycles immensely.
2) Now, very important, look up from your workplace, your confidence, your progress, your feelings of being so powerful, good, and masterful. See someone weak and defensive approach terrified. This is the old you that couldn’t do the job and they knew it. They weren’t emotionally strong enough to even look where to start, they were overwhelmed, scared, lashing out or withdrawing. Feel your caring for them, how much you wish they could have a better experience of their own life, how much they deserve a chance to start over, to shine, to excel. Call to them, reach out, really care: Oh don’t be scared, I missed you! I know you didn’t get this done because you were so hurt, imbalanced, and disconnected, not because you didn’t try or never wished that you could. Trust yourself, people get through this, I'll show you how. I’ll show you what to do, like anything it's not hard once you know how. You’re smart, brilliant, wonderful, amazing in fact! You were just too alone, and you needed me, and I needed you. You’re so good at so many other things, let’s do this one together, please be with me now.
3) And get up and go to them with your arms open wide. And see them shine with some hope, and cry, and hold them and stroke them like the long lost child of your soul that they are. You know how they feel, because you were them not so long ago! But there's a great difference between being and knowing, because they're still lost in the experience and you're not. So comfort them until their fear is gone and their tears have dried, until like the child again, they get their inquisitive nature and creativity and eagerness to help you back. Children love to be a helper! And if this part of yourself literally becomes a child in your arms, love them for that gift. Give them a simple task and be so proud to have them around. They won’t get in your way this time, because you're the adult who can let them go play their games without you when they think they are done.
You are not the child. Child games are not satisfying without a child to play them with you, and children are not able to do your adult work and goals, and thank goodness for that. As an adult you get to make your own choices and have the life you really want, while children can only play under someone else's rules. Sound familiar? If your previous lifestyle included hiding in your child and feeling like other people run the world and it's all so unfair and hurtful, then this meditation will help you find yourself as the master adult.
Note that as an adult you don't want to just be the parent to the child either, no matter how much that seems like a great way to love yourself. The problem is that the parent consciousness is very limited, it's not sufficient to become a master. This is because the parent must stay close to having been once a child, is a devoted extension of the child, and needs someone to take care of them too. Externally in the world, being a parent is another important task to do well in your cycle if you have children to take care of. But internally and always you need to be the adult. So in meditation you can assign a good parent to watch over your child, but you don't want to step down from your power to just become that parent. Thus here's a big clue in life: if you find yourself worrying and parentalizing and scolding when it comes to your tasks and your roles, you can know that internally you're being your child and reacting as a parent, and you're not being the adult who is able to master with confidence and joy.
Or what if the timid frightened self in your meditation turns not into a child but rather a big awkward defensive insecure teenager? What treasure you've found! Then you get to explain to them a little more about how great life can be when they’re fully grown. Undo whatever damage was done by the parentalizing non-adults you knew who complained that life was so hard. Implicitly or explicitly, those dysfunctional grown-ups of yesterday tried to boss and blame the teen you before you could even really do what they should have done. Their incompetence, their bad example, their lack of true mastery made you want to rebel and use up resources and stay a dependent adolescent forever, able to feel the pleasure of adult activities without the freedom to succeed for yourself or fix any mistakes. No wonder you got so frustrated, felt so trapped and alone!
Adolescents are responsible for exploring possibilities and collecting potentials and frankly profoundly enjoying to do so (that's why they get all the emotions and benefits of puberty!) They aren't supposed to know who they are or what their talents can fully do. But you the adult can, just like your higher self knows you far better than you can imagine. What your higher self doesn't know (as my teacher Lazaris explained to me) is how you want to work with it. This is something you two need to talk about and decide in a loving relationship. So if your teenager shows up as the one who couldn't do your life yet, get the dialogue going, and feel free to show them an adult's full enthusiasm for what mastery brings. They need your living breathing exciting example. Let them share too their own wonder and comprehension from the teen's perspective, in details far beyond the child's mind but for which the teen still doesn't have to be the one who is running the show. So after they've gotten a good lesson with you and taken some ideas for a spin (maybe done some homework), reward them with the keys to your car! Say: I trust you, have a great time with your friends, I know how amazing and special you really are. Your reward is to get to say this and mean it like no one else could when you were young, because you know what it was like to be the teen so bursting with life, and now you have become the master adult who is guided by your own higher self. The impact will be far greater than you can imagine.
Let the child and the adolescent go their own ways in this way, and notice any remaining hurt ashamed frightened adult still standing there at the edge of your mastered task, such as the you that you were just yesterday. Of course adults get to feel these things too, the goal is to not get stuck here because there's so much further better to go! This still-suffering individual then is your peer, they are the lost fragment of you that you took the leap over to make some practical progress and now need to not leave behind. Feel an overflowing compassion, forgiveness, and gratitude to welcome them home. Thank God I found you, thank you so much for making it this far! Or, if you find yourself just too upset and getting sucked into the feelings, then it's really good to be the receiver too. Just switch places for a while and let your own higher self be the master who holds and comforts you. There there, it's going to be alright now, we're back on track, together again. Of course you couldn’t function with all the wounds and complications we're clearing out with this meditation! Things will be so much clearer now, for all parts of you in connection with your own soul and with God.
So starting from whatever degree of self-awareness you need to experience, let your fragment self show their injuries now, note the forms that they take. The two of you get to clean these old hurts together, by their honesty and your light. Feel the mastery of the elements within you, as beautiful healing lights pour forth from your heart and your hands and all around. You have many guides, angels, fellow masters and friends of your soul encompassing the two of you, you can see that fully now. They understand everything you've gone through and they're so proud and happy to help. The old frightened you becomes fully healed and ready to join, so you two can now hug and become one, surrounded by love.
4) Now as a final transition step back to daily life, to your own point in time, you need to go back to your place of mastery and look at the task one more time. Feel bigger and stronger than ever before. Yes, anytime that this task, this need, this area comes up for review, you can take another step now. Picture what you actually need to do next in your life, where to start. What's the next step in time, from a list of tasks broken down, or gathering your tools, or making that list, or assessing the state of things. Nod to yourself in remembering the confidence: of course you can do this. You always could take the next little step, and now you can keep going because you are merged into the master self who has already done from their mastery every step after that.
After all, what people are most afraid in life is not the failure, if they were they wouldn't do it so easily and quickly. What people are afraid of is the success without end, because for that they have to keep up and keep going as everything just grows and grows; will this never stop?! Of course not, if life was meant to go well then you wouldn't want things to come to a halt! Only the master adult is already ahead of every challenge, with their connection to God that brings complete confidence and the endless gratitude for another need to respond. Imagine the joy of the liberated child and excited adolescent when they become the self-realized adult: I get to do this for myself now, I get to decide and make it forever right! Our needs give us treasures, they carry love in our style. What you always most needed was just to connect with your own master self who knows God. You suffered as the lost frightened fragment too long.
Now the meditation is over, so open your eyes. Oh you don't have to feel perfect, but give it a try. See how much easier the next step of what you need to do for your life has become, because you've cleared the road to your future from your past. You've connected more of your eternal continuous joyful living love-self! Do this meditation as often as you like, whenever you doubt that your soul, your master self, or your very own connection to God are waiting for you in that place of action that you need to take - it will help!
There's a world you're living in
No one else has your part
All God's children in the wind
Take it in and blow hard.
- Neil Young from song There's a World
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